Tear's can never be caught
by shadowflare7
Summary: The night before the battle with Deus. Emeralda comes to terms with growing up and Billy looks to redeem himself


Disclaimer - I don't own xenogears or any of it's characters squaresoft do. But I do own my story.  
  
Tear's can never be caught  
  
They had just got back from the zeboim ruins. Emeralda was starting to get use the drastic change of her body, but it still scared her slightly, she was getting to terms with it.  
  
Emeralda, Fei and Billy landed they're gears, got out of them and walked to the gear shop where the rest of the group was waiting for them.  
  
There was the usual calls as they meet they're companions. But it soon turned to silence as they saw Emeralda. In a way she was the odd one out anyway, although none were really normal, but Emeralda was different no matter how she looked at it.  
  
"What the hell happened to you Em?" Bart piped up, breaking the silence and asking the question everyone wanted to know the answer to.  
  
"young master" Sigurd snapped  
  
"Sorry" Bart apologized somewhere in the direction of Emeralda.  
  
"But what happened?" Asked Margie  
  
"I became adult" Emeralda answered  
  
"How?" Rico asked  
  
"We were standing at one place in the ruins and I had all these flash backs of Kim and then it happened" Said Fei  
  
"Wow, I can't believe your the same person" Said Bart  
  
"I go now" Said Emeralda, wanting to get away from the interested gaze.  
  
"How understanding of you all" Said Billy  
  
"What are you going off about now" Said Bart, clearly showing his dislike to Billy. Yet again.  
  
"You scared her off" Said Billy simply  
  
"Well it not everyday you see a child grow ten years older in the space of a day" Said Fei, surprised by Billy outburst.  
  
Bart was about to take the argument further and Fei could see Bart's intentions and cut him off.  
  
"Well anyway, tomorrow we take down Deus, so go get some rest" Said Fei  
  
Bart walked off muttering  
  
"Punk, telling me off in my own ship"  
  
Sigurd followed, rolling his eyes. And the rest of the group went they're own way's.  
  
******************************  
  
Billy walked through the yggdrasil making his way to the top deck. He wanted to see the moon one last time before he went to fight god, he may never have the chance again.  
  
In some way's it was ironic he thought, he was going to fight the things he had worshipped for years and based his life on. But then again Deus was not the god Billy believed in.  
  
He climbed up the ladder and walked up the small set of steps not paying much attention to his surroundings as he walked deep in thought. Then he snapped back to his senses as he noticed he was not alone on the deck. Emeralda was leaning over the rail at the end of the deck.  
  
Billy walked over to her and leaned onto the rail next to her, he felt incredibly stupid strait away, mainly due to the fact that he couldn't think of anything to say to even try to start a conversation. It seemed that Emeralda was deep in her own thoughts and hadn't noticed him there so this gave him the choice of leaving before she noticed him or trying to make something of the terrible situation he had put himself in.  
  
Billy was not a talkative person, he was friendly he just never very good at talking to people at the same age of himself. But for some reason he couldn't fathom he decided to stay.  
  
"Hello" Billy said, trying to sound cheerful considering they were standing on the edge of the battle for mankind.  
  
"Hello" She said turning to face him looking a little startled.  
  
Looking into her eyes Billy realized just how much she had changed. Gone was the angry child calling out for Kim. She had matured so much as well it was unreal. She looked so elegant even while surprised, but she looked alone too.  
  
"How are you feeling now?" He asked trying to break the tension  
  
"Better, I feel all different now" She said  
  
She turned to look back across the horizon and so did Billy.  
  
"Why you come here?" Emeralda asked  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"The others look at me different, they're friend's, but I'm not them"  
  
"Well I don't look at you differently, the other's were just surprised that's all"  
  
"Thank-you" she said, the edge of a smile creeping onto her lips  
  
She moved a little closer to him and Billy could feel his heart beating like it was trying to escape his chest. He felt so nervous that he was surprised he could stand. It wasn't as if he was objecting, it's just, his thought's trailed. Obviously he'd never thought of Emeralda like that before.  
  
She looked at him and he started into her amber eyes for what seemed a millennia. He felt intoxicated by her beauty.  
  
Bart appeared suddenly behind them bringing attention to himself with a cough. Billy wasn't sure whether he was glad Bart came or if he wanted to stay undisturbed a while longer and stare into her eyes just a little longer, a few more minutes maybe.  
  
"Due to popular demand" Bart said "And my own opinion" he added hastily.  
  
"I feel that I should formally apologize for my rash behavior earlier" He said staring at Emeralda, trying to compose a regal face.  
  
"I forgive" said Emeralda smiling  
  
"Thanks, as you can see some of us know when we should say sorry" Said Bart, looking at Billy.  
  
Billy desperately wanted to pull out his handgun's and shoot Bart a number of times, but somehow he resisted. Bart gave his thumps up sign and walked off back towards the hatch.  
  
**************************  
  
Emeralda felt better when Bart apologized. She felt different now and she wondered if the other's would not accept her, Bart was sometimes rash with his word's but hearing him apologize made her realize that she was still part of the group no matter what the change. But it was just another worry off her mind right now she seemed to grasping back her life slowly.  
  
What was more scary than her body changing was her mind. Her thought's seemed tuned into another wave length and she was trying to get use to it in a very short period of time.  
  
She wished Elly was here. Fei seemed to be coming to terms with these feelings and emotion's just as much she was right now so she couldn't look to him. And Kim and Elly were gone forever. She wished so much she could see them one last time. A tear ran down her cheek and fell off into the distance. She tried to watch it fall but her vision blurred even more and a sob escaped.  
  
She fell into a rather startled Billy who had been staring into the distance trying to think of something say. Emeralda buried her face in his cloak crying. Billy's mind was a blur at first but he slowly wrapped his arms around her. He knelt down and she practically collapsed with him, but he still held her kneeling on both knee's. she was almost shaking with sob's.  
  
Billy was hardly an expert in these situation's but for some reason he knew right now that Emeralda probily just needed to cry and let everything out and she needed someone to support her.  
  
He lost any recollection of time, all he knew that it was night, he was still in the same place and she was sobbing lightly now. In a way Billy felt similar to Emeralda in that he didn't really want to be alone right now when he could die tomorrow, it felt comforting just to touch another body and feel it's warmth and life.  
  
After a little while longer and Emeralda stopped crying all together. She looked up at Billy and he let go of his hold on her.  
  
"Why you move?" she asked as she hugged him deeply as if he was her only strand of life.  
  
In a clumsy sort of way Billy put his arms around her again and held her.  
  
It was hard to think now for Emeralda as she looked at Billy. Was this love? Or was it just Comfort in another. Either way she liked it and needed it tonight.  
  
Emeralda looked up at him again.  
  
"You think we beat Deus?" She asked quietly  
  
"If you have faith" he replied  
  
"That not answer" She said  
  
"We're fighting for our own reason's and that give's us strength, for we have a reason and belief"  
  
"But I don't have anything"  
  
"You have to make something"  
  
She smiled.  
  
"You be reason"  
  
He bent down and kissed her very softly on the lips.  
  
"Now you have something" He said looking upon her confused face that had the edge of a smile.  
  
"Do you have faith?" She asked  
  
"I lost it after the ethos. I think I'm starting to feel it again"  
  
Remembering when he found out what the ethos really was gave him that sinking feeling in his mind, it filled him dread. Emeralda held one of his hands and the touch and warmth of her seemed to drive all the dread away, like a light piercing darkness. For the first time those memories didn't seem to cast a shadow over him anymore.  
  
He smiled at his new found support and stared into her amber gaze and marveled at how relaxed he felt. He didn't feel the so nervous around her now.  
  
Emeralda looked up at him and returned the earlier kiss, lightly on the lips. They sat there for as long as she could remember before she fell asleep with Billy watching over her. There seemed to be no need for more words. Whether or not it was some kind mutual understanding Emeralda wasn't really sure, but it didn't matter. She felt safe and that's what she'd wanted since she came back into this world. Maybe she had Faith in him.  
  
Billy felt so alive with Emeralda in his arm's, was this love and another side of responsibility. It was love, yes he could feel what it created. Hope, and renewed faith from the rags it had became, he had someone to believe in. He wasn't alone anymore.  
  
Billy looked down on his companion. Asleep, she looked just as beautiful maybe more. But he liked to see her expression's and movement's just to see life through her.  
  
They fell asleep with arms wrapped around each other.  
  
Let tomorrow come.  
  
When the first rays sunlight touched them hope will be renewed. 


End file.
